Showing posts with label #LeadershipTuesdays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #LeadershipTuesdays. Show all posts

Thursday, October 1, 2026

Bullying: Young Lives Lost Too Soon

Content Notification: This article discusses bullying, youth suicide and suicide methods. Some of the content may be difficult for some readers. If you or someone you know is struggling or experiencing thoughts of suicide, help is available. Call or text the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988 for free, confidential support 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Phoebe Nora Maria Prince, 15

Every year at the start of the school year, I send out a blog about a 15-year-old immigrant student who committed suicide after months of bullying by peers from her high school. Her name was Phoebe Prince. Phoebe was described by family and friends as an enthusiastic, gifted, and creative child with “exceptional beauty.” Months before starting high school, Prince along with her American born mother and younger sister moved from her in Ireland where she was born to South Hadley, Massachusetts to experience living in America and be closer to her maternal family. In September 2009, she enrolled at South Hadley High School as a freshman. Sadly, after suffering months of bullying that culminated in an entire day of insults, taunting and harassment from school classmates, Prince came home from school and hung herself in a closet in her South Hadley home on January 14, 2010. She was found by her twelve year old sister.

It appears Prince had clashes with several other teens over dating relationships.” That along with her Irish accent and cultural differences made her a target. Her last day at school had been a particularly tumultuous day where she had been called an Irish whore, stalked and taunted by a gang of students. 

 

Carl Walker Joseph-Hoover, 11

About eight months earlier in a town about 20 minutes from South Hadley, an African American eleven-year-old sixth grader named Carl Walker Joseph-Hoover died by suicide in the same manner as Phoebe. He was found by his mother Sirdeaner L. Walker in their Springfield, Massachusetts home on April 6, 2009 just days before what would have been his 12th birthday on April 17. Carl, a new student at the New Leadership Charter School, had endured months of bullying. He was called gay by classmates and teased because of the way he dressed. They also accused him of acting like a girl. Carl’s mother said her son was a Boy Scout and played football and basketball. It was not reported that young Carl identified as gay.

Youth Suicide by Age, Gender, Race and Identity:

According to the CDC, suicide is the second leading cause of death among teens ages 10-14 and the third leading cause of death for teens 15-19. One in five high school students have considered attempting suicide. Further, 27% of girls have seriously considered attempting suicide. This figure represents a decline from 30% in 2021, which is trending in the right direction, but it is still nearly double the rate for boys. (Youth Risk Behavior Study, CDC, 2023 data) Girls may be more likely to have suicidal thoughts or attempts, but boys die by suicide at higher rates because they use highly lethal methods.

The JED Foundation published an article in March 2026 with recent CDC data that showed that the overall youth suicide rates have started declining compared to the significant rise in the rate between 2007 and 2022. And while that provides some optimism, there are other findings that signal concern.

Suicide rates within certain racial groups are increasing. The suicide rate among Black youth ages 10-17 has risen 144%, the fastest growing rate among racial groups. For Asian American youth, suicide is the leading cause of death. Twenty-five percent of American Indians and Alaska Natives have seriously considered a suicide attempt. Although Hispanic teens have lower rates of death by suicide when compared to their White, Black or Asian counterparts, they report disproportionately high rates of mental distress and suicide attempts. (CDC)

Last but not least, with respect to identity, LGBTQ+ youth are also at high risk for self-injurious thoughts and behavior (SITB) due to social factors and mistreatment. The Children’s Hospital Association stated in 2025 that 20% of LGBTQ+ students attempted suicide during the past 12 months and 70% experienced persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness.

It is important to remember this about suicide in general: most individuals that attempt suicide do not necessarily want to be dead. They just want the intense psychological pain or life circumstances to stop. So what can we do to help?

Bullying: It’s Not Their Problem, It’s Our Problem, Too.

October is National Bullying Prevention Month and the stories of Phoebe Prince and Carl Joseph-Hoover provide us as a community with an opportunity to empathize and feel the harmful effects and impact of bullying. By definition, bullying is unwanted repeated aggressive behavior that can take the form of physical as well as verbal abuse, spreading rumors, public humiliation, social exclusion or cyberbullying. It involves an observed or perceived imbalance of power.

One in five students are bullied. So Phoebe and Carl could have been your daughter or son, sister or brother, niece or nephew, cousin or friend -- or someone you saw every day at school. Although being

bullied has not been determined to be a direct cause of suicide, it can be, however, a contributing factor along with other mental health conditions such as depression, and/or alcohol and drug abuse. It is important to raise awareness and address behaviors that contribute to students feeling unsafe in environments where they may be targeted because they do not fit in.

In Phoebe Prince’s case the Massachusetts District Attorney’s Office believed that bullying as well as other actions by her classmates were a contributing factor in her death and indicted six teenagers from South Hadley High School with various felony charges ranging from civil rights violations to stalking. Students should understand that there can be a legal consequence to bullying that can have life-altering impacts on their own life as well as the bullying victim.

Using Our Collective Voice and Words For Positive Impact

Very early, children learned the importance of words. From the first moment they begin to speak discernible words, they are rewarded with smiles, claps, hugs, and out-and-out-glee by almost everyone who is within hearing distance. Well, that's the case if they speak or repeat the "right" words and not the "bad" words that sometimes they inadvertently pick up. Parents and teachers tell them, "Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you". For young children, this adage is supposed to discourage them from resorting to physical violence motivated by the words of an antagonist. But as they grow older, they begin to comprehend that words can be used as weapons. In fact, hurtful words can leave an impression and hurt that takes longer to heal than actual physical wounds. These wounds can follow us into adulthood if not properly addressed and healed.

Time supposedly heals all wounds. But as I learned from overhearing a discussion on wound care, time by itself is not enough to ensure that a wound heals correctly. The kind of treatment a wound receives will determine if the wound heals properly. Depending on the severity of the wound, some other type of intervention may be needed in the healing process for it to be successful. But, what is the right kind of treatment? One type of treatment may be seeking support from a therapist or counseling professional. Another intervention may be a new environment. An essential agent in this process is communication and creating safe spaces where open and honest can take place and decisions can be made by the person affected and those charged with their care.

Students should be encouraged to speak up about bullying and seek support by telling a responsible adult when they are the target of bullying or they observe other students experiencing bullying. Making it personal: if you as a student see someone being bullied, don't participate in it. Don't laugh. Don't start recording it on your phone to post later. Speak up! It takes courage but you can do it. Do for someone else what you would what them to do for you. 

Parents should communicate regularly with their children by asking questions. See the National Bullying Prevention website below for resources on how to have a conversation with your child about bullying. Let them know that telling an adult about abusive behavior is not snitching because everyone has a right to be safe at school and be treated with respect. Educators and parents must take action to ensure bullying is not tolerated and properly addressed.

Lastly, as a community, we must all be committed to cultivating environments where individuals feel safe and included. We, not just parents and educators, must also be approachable and show care for others. Our words and actions have the power to create safe spaces where others are encouraged. Alternatively we also have the power to be indifferent and allow spaces within our sphere of influence where others can be destructively torn down. You have the power to choose. Choose wisely. (Proverbs 18:21 Bible) 

by Nona Ogunsula, MBA
nona@libertyinkpro.com
http://libertyinkpro.com