Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Pausing to reflect...Knowing The Right Way To Help

One day as I stopped at a red light on a busy street, a middle aged man, a panhandler, approached my car holding a cup and asked for some money.  I instinctively looked at his hands and fingers.  They looked a little puffy.  This may seem like a weird reflex, but there is a reason why I did this.  During my college years, I can remember so vividly visiting friends who lived off campus and encountering men on their way to shoot up heroin in the alley behind my friend's rented rowhouse.  From the apartment's balcony, we watched in amazement as the heroin addicts went into the alley and under the steps or porch of the house next door to get high.  Most of the guys had a similar characteristic, puffy arms, hands, and fingers. 

I told the man that I did not really have anything and that was the truth.  I hardly ever carry money.  And that's true these days more than ever.  Even though I am caught up in my own set of problems I wanted to do something, but in that split second, I could not think of anything to do or how I could help this man.

A few days later, as I reflected on the incident, I also thought about a radio news report I heard about veterans who were homeless and unemployed.  I have to admit that I got somewhat perturbed.  All this talk about how "we" support our veterans and here it is that some of these guys are living in shelters and scrambling to find work.  I wondered if this guy could be a veteran.

Today, I was trying to think of ways I could respond to such request for help in the future.  I thought about maybe giving a gift card instead of cash.  I certainly don't want to give something that can be used to buy drugs. It's a complicated issue.  You want to be helpful, but sometimes it's difficult to know the right thing to do. 

Any good suggestions?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Because the incident stayed with you longer than the next red light and its panhandler, it may be your cross. Decide now, the best way to carry it.

Nona said...

Thanks for your comment. I read it earlier, but reading it today impacted me differently. Again thanks for sharing.

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